sparatus:

gaydan-alenko:

sparatus:

zcvrcn:

sparatus:

could you imagine straight people in mass effect. ghastly. how horrifying. straights in the future and in space…. seven-word horror story………

somebody once tried to tell me that jeff moreau, joker, man who has nothing but snappy comebacks and casual anarchist tendencies, was straight

no one whose nickname is joker can be straight

characters who cannot possibly be straight

• jeff “joker” moreau [source: nickname]
• saren arterius [source: that fashion sense and level of #drama can only be pulled off by a gay man]
• any salarian or asari [source: canon baybie]
• tali’zorah [source: crush on shepard founded completely on the circumstances of how they met not on shep’s appearance]
• garrus vakarian [source: romance with shepard based on strong friendship and trust not appearance]
• councilor sparatus [source: dramatic entrance KING]
• admiral hackett [source: too good a bro to not be]

characters who are definitely straight:

• the illusive man [source: slimy, disgusting, shadow broker records prove womanizing misogynist dirtbag]
• that’s it he’s the only one the rest are all lgbt baybie

gavin archer is a hettie

#so is kai leng

you are so fucking right, how could i have forgotten. gavin archer, noted terrible person who thinks torturing not only an autistic person but also his own fucking brother is an acceptable method of obtaining scientific “progress,” is CLEARLY straight and also not valid and will burn in hell

kai leng is one of those straighties who worships katanas and doesn’t wash his hair, and in fact reminds me of a dude i knew in high school who was very straight and very gross.

thank you for your valuable contribution