fireflysummers:

I know that the new Artemis Fowl trailer is just the early teaser and I should withhold judgement, but I’m overall rather mixed because Arty was my middle school experience. I adored those books so much. 

So assuming no significant changes were made to the content of the books, here’s how I would script out the eventual extended trailer.

Intro screens playing the reports about the supposed death of Artemis’s father, with a droning report of the bombing. Camera pans to show Artemis, watching them with a look of determination. 

Artemis: “He’s alive Butler, I know it. And I’m going to find him.“ 

Like flipping a switch, the camera zooms out, giving a full view of the room, revealing it to be more of a laboratory space. We see a short montage of Artemis doing Boy Genius things that give the audience a clear understanding that this is not your regular mopey rich boy. 

Artemis: “The Fowl Criminal Empire lives on, but not well enough. We need increased funds if I’m to keep up the search for my father.“ 

Butler: "You have a plan?" 

Artemis: "Of course. We’re going to steal them." 

Montage of images of the various faeries, but like. Dated images of the old LEP recon unit that match our mythologies, as well as aesthetic shots that show off things like the pixie’s wings, etc… 

Artemis (voiceover): "From the fairies." 

The  shot is interrupted by laughter, and we zoom out to see Juliet cackling her head off. 

Juliet: "Fairies? Really? A 12-year-old supergenius and his bodyguard flew to Ho Chi Minh to chase fairies?" 

 They’re sitting  in the lavish study of the Fowl mansion, and Artemis and Butler both look uncomfortable. Artemis clears his throat.

Artemis: "Assuming I am not totally insane, there’s something…else you should know about the fairies." 

 The screen goes dark for half a second, and the sound of a gun clicking/charging is heard. The camera pulls back, revealing the barrel of a high-tech gun interlaced with runes. The shot continues to zoom out, revealing an entire armed unit of obviously non-human individuals, and continues to zoom out to reveal them laying siege to Fowl mansion. 

The title card appears, and you hear holly’s voice over the top.

”Stay back human. You have no idea what you’re dealing with.”